Q: Thanks for doing this. It’s been a long time.LEFT KNEE: Yes, it has.
Q: Sorry about the injury.
LEFT KNEE: Things happen.
Q: Like the 17th at Augusta National.
LEFT KNEE: Yeah.
Q: Did you see it coming?
LEFT KNEE: I saw the ball, I saw the pine needles and I saw the tree limb. I thought somebody could get hurt.
Q: So you have a Grade 1 mild medial collateral ligament sprain.
LEFT KNEE: What?
Q: Your injury. It was described as a Grade 1 mild medial collateral ligament sprain.
LEFT KNEE: That’s doctor gibberish. I’m not feeling mild.
Q: They called it a minor injury.
LEFT KNEE: Minor? Really? Well, you know what Bill Walton said about minor surgery, don’t you?
Q: What?
LEFT KNEE: He said the only minor surgery is surgery performed on somebody else. Minor injury—yeah, right. Not after what I’ve been through.
Q: How’s the Achilles tendon?
LEFT KNEE: He’s sore. It’s tough, you know, with two of us injured on the same side.
Q: The treatment is cold-water therapy and soft-tissue treatment. Is that right?
LEFT KNEE: Yeah, a lot of couch time. Been watching the NBA Playoffs. Damn Lakers.
Q: Can I ask you one swing question?
LEFT KNEE: Go ahead.
Q: What do you think of Sean Foley?
LEFT KNEE: I’d like to break his video camera.
Q: Thanks for taking the time.
LEFT KNEE: You got it.
−The Armchair Golfer
Related:
Exclusive Post-PGA Interview with Tiger’s Left Knee
Exclusive Interview with Tiger’s Left Knee
(This is an ARMCHAIR GOLF spoof. Image courtesy of McAlpine/Flickr.)
